Microsoft is dusting off its holiday sweater tradition after skipping 2024, launching three new designs that celebrate the company's most beloved - and ridiculed - products. The tech giant's latest merchandise drop includes an "Artifact" sweater starring Clippy, a Zune brown variant, and an Xbox-themed option, priced between $59.95 and $79.95.
Microsoft just made the holidays a little more nostalgic - and arguably uglier. The Redmond giant dropped three new holiday sweaters that read like a greatest hits album of the company's most memorable product moments, from Clippy's paperclip wisdom to the Zune's brown mystique.
The star of this year's collection is the "Artifact" sweater, which puts everyone's favorite (or most annoying) office assistant front and center. Clippy gets surrounded by a digital museum of Microsoft history - MSN, Minesweeper, Internet Explorer, MS-DOS, and multiple Windows logos create a tapestry of tech nostalgia. It's the kind of design that'll either spark fond memories or PTSD flashbacks from anyone who lived through the late 90s and early 2000s.
But Microsoft didn't stop at software nostalgia. The company's embracing one of its biggest hardware flops with a Zune brown holiday sweater that features what appears to be an interactive play button. Here's hoping that button actually lights up or plays the Zune startup sound - anything less would be a missed opportunity for premium ugly sweater theater.
The Xbox entry takes a more straightforward approach with a green design that celebrates the gaming division's success story. While Xbox has become one of Microsoft's crown jewel brands, putting it alongside Clippy and the Zune creates an interesting contrast between the company's wins and its loveable losers.
Pricing puts the Artifact and Zune options at $79.95 each, while the Xbox sweater can be pre-ordered for $59.95. That's a premium for officially licensed ugly - but then again, authentic Microsoft nostalgia doesn't come cheap.
This marks Microsoft's return to the ugly sweater game after mysteriously skipping 2024. The tradition started in 2018 when the company began sending sweaters to Windows fans, then expanded to public sales in 2020 to support charitable causes. Clippy dominated the 2022 edition, proving that some characters never really die in the Microsoft universe.
The sweaters will be available through Microsoft's online company store and the physical location in Redmond, Washington. New York City's Microsoft Store experience center will also stock them for East Coast fans who want to touch the fabric of tech history.
